Vega might Not

In 1982, Men at Work, released the song “Down Under”.  In the song. A six foot man, full of muscles gives someone a Vegemite sandwich.  It was not a simple matter for him to just answer the question, “are you from the land down under?” he avoids the question, smiles and hands off the Vegemite sandwich.  I think that worst part of this song is that it started an odd curiosity in Vegemite.  When people heard that I was headed to Melbourne, some of them asked, “You going to have a Vegemite sandwich?” .  To be honest, I did not have any intention of going out of my way to try Vegemite but, there at breakfast, they had small packets of Vegemite.   When I saw these small packets,  I decided to give it a try.  Just a small taste.  Vegemite is black, and gooey.  It does not wiggle like jello it just sits there.  Unfortunately, I did not smell it to see if it had an odor.  If I had, I probably would not have put two very small drops of it on the end of a fork.  I figured that would be enough to get a taste and if I liked it, I could double it up to four small drops.  Slowly, I put the fork in my mouth, and cautiously licked the stuff off my fork.    As soon as I put it into my mouth I had a full body dry heave.    My face immediately contorted into what I think could have been an impression of Popeye.  It took a minute to relax my face.  I can honestly say that Vegemite is evil.  When the four horseman come, they will be bringing Vegemite with them.  I always wondered what they did with all that stuff from EPA Superfund clean-up sites,  I now know that they  collected it all together, mixed it with lots of salt and packaged it under the name Vegemite.  The six-foot guy, full of muscle gives the Vegemite sandwich,, with a smile.  The lyrics do not state this but it was a sadistic, evil, mean-spirited smile.  I have no idea why someone would give another person a Vegemite sandwich and then smile about it.  I guess if the other person was  Sarah Palin or a cast member of Jersey Shore, that is okay.  Other than that, I think it would just be mean to hand one of these to someone.   

 

While I am at it, I was also asked to verify or unmask the urban legend that water goes down the drain in a clockwise direction here in the southern hemisphere, opposite to the Northern hemisphere where it goes down the drain in a counter-clockwise direction.  So, as the designated Mythbuster from Austin, I checked it out.  I ran multiple experiments using the bathroom sink, the toilet and the bathtub.  After several hours, 30 gallons of water, complaints from the hotel manager and scientific analysis, I can honestly say that, it is a fifty-fifty mix, sometimes one direction and sometimes the other.  The exception to that is the toilet, it has a power flush which forces the flow in a clockwise direction.  There you have it, it just does not matter.  At least in the Holiday Inn.  For a conclusive examination of the subject,  I will be checking the theory out at the Hotel Essex later today because of my recent eviction from said Holiday Inn.